Weekly E-votional
CASE DISMISSED
I have a friend who tells the story of how when he was in high school he went through a very difficult time. He had been a straight A student with great potential for being the valedictorian of his graduating class. Not only was he smart, but he was also very popular and very athletic. Recruiting scouts from colleges and universities were already swarming around the stadiums to watch him play football. Away from school was no different he was elected president of his youth group at church, and on his way to being an eagle-scout. He was the kind of person that that all his peers wanted to be friends with, while all of his friend’s parents wished that he was theirs. One night, however, after a big game he went out with some of his classmates to celebrate their victory. Many there were drinking and some were even using drugs and generally doing things that they knew they shouldn’t be doing. And feeling a bit left out he made the decision (against his better judgment) to join in.
Later that night he was pulled over for a traffic violation, he was arrested for a number of different charges, minor in possession of alcohol, driving while intoxicated, and to make matters worse one of his friends who had ridden in the car with him earlier had left a bag of pills in his back seat, so he was also chares with possession of an illegal substance with the intent to deliver.
His world began to crumble around him. His name was printed in the paper, his reputation was wrecked. His parent began to tell him that he had ruined his future. That no college would possibly look at him and that he would have these charges on his permanent record, and they would hang around his neck for the rest of his life. His friend’s parents, his teachers, even the people at his church began to look at him with distrust and shame.
He saw the backward glances, he heard the rumors about him, he felt the disappointment and disapproval of others, and it began to affect him. He said that it began to alter the way he saw himself. When he looked in the mirror, he no longer saw, a football star or a straight A student, he no longer saw the president of his church youth group, instead he saw a bad seed a felon, a looser, someone who would always be marked by his past with no way to escape it.
That self view of began to affect the way he lived his life. Feeling that he had lost all hope of his former dreams, he began to slack off in his school work and skip football practice to hang out with the wrong crowd. He began doing more things that he knew he should do. What did he have to loose now he thought.
Over the next few weeks he was brought home on a number of occasions by the police and was cited for a number of infractions.
By the time of his first court appearance he had been picked by the police more than half a dozen times.
The judge was stern looking fellow with a deep raspy voice. He asked son what’s gotten in to you? I hear that you were a straight A student, a star on the football team, every one thought you had potential for greatness. What’s gotten into you?
The boy replied, “Sir, it doesn’t matter the damage is done, this will follow me the rest of my life I can’t fix it I can’t get away from it. My life is over.”
The Judges sat back in his chair and said,” Oh, I see. May I as ask you a question? If this was no longer on your record would that make any difference in how you would act?”
Those words caught him by surprise; He never even considered that to be possibility. Tears began to well in his eyes and a lump formed in his throat so that he couldn’t even speak. He just nodded slightly as he trembled.
My friend said that in the next moment he heard the two words that changed his life. “Case dismissed.” With those two words my friend was given a second chance not bound by the specter of his past. The judge not only dismissed the charges, but expunged the arrest record. My friend went back to school, hit the books and graduated second in his class, he received a scholarship to college both for football & for academics and was well respected amongst his peers & the faculty, and because of his experience with that merciful judge he learned a lesson that changed his focus in life. My friend is now a pastor, whose primary goal in life is to teach people the meaning of ‘grace’.
The word grace simply means “Unmerited favor.” It means being blessed when no blessing is deserved. It means receiving forgiveness when none is merited.
That’s what God offers to us in Jesus Christ. Scripture says that “while we were yet sinner Christ died for us.” Jesus died to offer us grace, a second chance to overcome our past sinfulness and to begin life anew with God. What a gift! He didn’t come to save those who are perfect and just; no, he came for all of us ‘while we were yet sinners.’ In essence He came to tell us that if we would only believe and trust in Him, we too can hear those powerful words… “Case Dismissed”
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Learning to Overlook offenses.
Wisdom helps a person restrain his anger, and it is to his glory to overlook a transgression or an offense. - Proverbs 19:11
Have you noticed how easily people take offense these days? We don't seem to have a lot of patience, thoughtfulness, or tact. Everyone seems to be balancing a chip on their shoulder and wearing their hearts on their sleeves. To make matters worse we speak and act in response to our frustrations before thin king things through. As a result, our knee jerk reactions to these frustrations we have with others often lead to more trouble and pain than the original perceived offense.
I was sitting at a McDonald's the other day, randomly listening to the myriad of conversations going on around me. I was astonished at how many people were just complaining about how someone did them wrong. After the minor nature of some of these 'Major" offenses, I began wondering why so many adults never seem to grow past the social maturity level of seventh graders. I thought to myself "We seriously need to grow up!"
As Christians we are called to be people of grace and forgiveness. The Bible says that we should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry. Finally when we do speak, we are to speak truth in love, with wisdom as our filter. Unfortunately we as Christ followers wrongly allow our emotional and spiritual immaturity to get the best of us. Instead of approaching situations as those who have been so graciously forgiven for our own numerous thoughtless actions and attitudes, we vengefully lash out or passive-aggressively retaliate, all the while thinking we are justified in our bitter actions. BUT WE ARE NOT!
Consider this, how would the majority of us react if someone said something to us in a curt or "overly" direct way? Wouldn't most of us we feel scolded and bitter, and as a result we would either respond in kind or distance ourselves from that person all the while licking our wounds, and holding a grudge letting our wounds fester.
If a friend, family member, or co-worker overlooks something that in the moment you find important, or perhaps they forget to include you in a conversation, or perhaps they cancel a lunch date at the last minute, or simply fails to show up, perhaps they don't to follow through on a task they were asked to do, how do we respond? Don't we get upset and feel that they are disloyal. And do we walk the Christian path by going to them asking them what happened, seeing if there might have been an emergency or unforeseen factor that lead to the situation, and do we try and reconcile? Or isn't it more likely that we choose the self centered path of emailing, calling, texting, or subtly working our complaints into our conversations with others telling them all about how unreliable or how thoughtless the "offender" had been. Some of us go even further and devise subtle ways to get even or assassinate their reputation in order to make their relationships with others more uncomfortable.
Have you ever had a really bad day, when our boss or our spouse call us to account for something we have done, or failed to do? Instead of truly reflecting on or repenting for how our actions may have caused problems, or at least taking a moment to consider how you might learn and grow from that moment; most of us just allow our embarrassment to grow into anger. Then we go to the water cooler and tear down the person's reputation in front of anyone who will listen.
Or perhaps it's just been one of those days we, nothing has gone right and we want the world to empathize with us, and when on the occasion we don't get the "proper amount of ego stroking", we allow ourselves to feel wounded and unappreciated. So in turn we go out of our way to spread our misery around! But we need to realize that other people can't always make us feel better, and we can't expect others to always "get" what we are going through, We need to remember that it is not reasonable to expect someone to be available 24/7 for our own constant emotional support.
It even happens with our interaction with strangers. Think about a negative experience you may have had at a restaurant. How did you respond, did you leave a bad tip, did you complain and make a scene, did you tell all of your friends how bad it was. But did you stop and think that perhaps it wasn't the waitresses fault, perhaps the kitchens staff is new. Perhaps she is having a bad day or having problems at home. (Haven't we had days like that, too?)
I have found in my life that when I feel offended, ignored, or wounded, my responses have not often been a holy ones. I also find that I wind up feeling worse about how poorly I respond, because inevitably I find out later that the other person had good reason for acting the way they did, or at other times I catch myself doing or saying something very similar to someone else. All of this after I have damaged my relationship even further by grinching and moaning to other people, anyone and everyone except the one person I should have been talking to!
As a people redeemed by grace in spite of our own failings, we need to learn to let wisdom lead us in our response to frustrating interactions with others .If you feel wounded, slighted, ignored,left out, embarrassed, or scolded... think before you respond! Is what you are about to say or do edifying? Does it build up and encourage, or does it tear down, and destroy? Have you ever been guilty of something similar? I bet you have... we all have!
So Christian, get down off the soap box and cut other people some slack. Take the chip off of your own shoulder; stop wearing your heart on your sleeve; and thicken your skin. Before you let anger, bitterness, spitefulness or judgmentalism take root, remember that GOD forgave you all you have done, maybe it's time you passed on a little of that grace!
If in the end you feel that you need to deal with the situation go first to the offender and seek to forgive, to understanding, and to reconcile. Only then do you have the right to talk to, text, facebook, IM, email, telegraph, snail mail, or skywrite any one else about it!
"Wisdom helps a person restrain his anger, and it is to his glory to overlook a transgression or an offense." - Proverbs 19:11 ...and it also keeps us from making matters worse!
Have a blessed week!
-Pastor Jeff
Christ United Methodist Church of Cabot AR
10 Elk Horn Lane Cabot AR 72023
501-843-2302
Have you noticed how easily people take offense these days? We don't seem to have a lot of patience, thoughtfulness, or tact. Everyone seems to be balancing a chip on their shoulder and wearing their hearts on their sleeves. To make matters worse we speak and act in response to our frustrations before thin king things through. As a result, our knee jerk reactions to these frustrations we have with others often lead to more trouble and pain than the original perceived offense.
I was sitting at a McDonald's the other day, randomly listening to the myriad of conversations going on around me. I was astonished at how many people were just complaining about how someone did them wrong. After the minor nature of some of these 'Major" offenses, I began wondering why so many adults never seem to grow past the social maturity level of seventh graders. I thought to myself "We seriously need to grow up!"
As Christians we are called to be people of grace and forgiveness. The Bible says that we should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry. Finally when we do speak, we are to speak truth in love, with wisdom as our filter. Unfortunately we as Christ followers wrongly allow our emotional and spiritual immaturity to get the best of us. Instead of approaching situations as those who have been so graciously forgiven for our own numerous thoughtless actions and attitudes, we vengefully lash out or passive-aggressively retaliate, all the while thinking we are justified in our bitter actions. BUT WE ARE NOT!
Consider this, how would the majority of us react if someone said something to us in a curt or "overly" direct way? Wouldn't most of us we feel scolded and bitter, and as a result we would either respond in kind or distance ourselves from that person all the while licking our wounds, and holding a grudge letting our wounds fester.
If a friend, family member, or co-worker overlooks something that in the moment you find important, or perhaps they forget to include you in a conversation, or perhaps they cancel a lunch date at the last minute, or simply fails to show up, perhaps they don't to follow through on a task they were asked to do, how do we respond? Don't we get upset and feel that they are disloyal. And do we walk the Christian path by going to them asking them what happened, seeing if there might have been an emergency or unforeseen factor that lead to the situation, and do we try and reconcile? Or isn't it more likely that we choose the self centered path of emailing, calling, texting, or subtly working our complaints into our conversations with others telling them all about how unreliable or how thoughtless the "offender" had been. Some of us go even further and devise subtle ways to get even or assassinate their reputation in order to make their relationships with others more uncomfortable.
Have you ever had a really bad day, when our boss or our spouse call us to account for something we have done, or failed to do? Instead of truly reflecting on or repenting for how our actions may have caused problems, or at least taking a moment to consider how you might learn and grow from that moment; most of us just allow our embarrassment to grow into anger. Then we go to the water cooler and tear down the person's reputation in front of anyone who will listen.
Or perhaps it's just been one of those days we, nothing has gone right and we want the world to empathize with us, and when on the occasion we don't get the "proper amount of ego stroking", we allow ourselves to feel wounded and unappreciated. So in turn we go out of our way to spread our misery around! But we need to realize that other people can't always make us feel better, and we can't expect others to always "get" what we are going through, We need to remember that it is not reasonable to expect someone to be available 24/7 for our own constant emotional support.
It even happens with our interaction with strangers. Think about a negative experience you may have had at a restaurant. How did you respond, did you leave a bad tip, did you complain and make a scene, did you tell all of your friends how bad it was. But did you stop and think that perhaps it wasn't the waitresses fault, perhaps the kitchens staff is new. Perhaps she is having a bad day or having problems at home. (Haven't we had days like that, too?)
I have found in my life that when I feel offended, ignored, or wounded, my responses have not often been a holy ones. I also find that I wind up feeling worse about how poorly I respond, because inevitably I find out later that the other person had good reason for acting the way they did, or at other times I catch myself doing or saying something very similar to someone else. All of this after I have damaged my relationship even further by grinching and moaning to other people, anyone and everyone except the one person I should have been talking to!
As a people redeemed by grace in spite of our own failings, we need to learn to let wisdom lead us in our response to frustrating interactions with others .If you feel wounded, slighted, ignored,left out, embarrassed, or scolded... think before you respond! Is what you are about to say or do edifying? Does it build up and encourage, or does it tear down, and destroy? Have you ever been guilty of something similar? I bet you have... we all have!
So Christian, get down off the soap box and cut other people some slack. Take the chip off of your own shoulder; stop wearing your heart on your sleeve; and thicken your skin. Before you let anger, bitterness, spitefulness or judgmentalism take root, remember that GOD forgave you all you have done, maybe it's time you passed on a little of that grace!
If in the end you feel that you need to deal with the situation go first to the offender and seek to forgive, to understanding, and to reconcile. Only then do you have the right to talk to, text, facebook, IM, email, telegraph, snail mail, or skywrite any one else about it!
"Wisdom helps a person restrain his anger, and it is to his glory to overlook a transgression or an offense." - Proverbs 19:11 ...and it also keeps us from making matters worse!
Have a blessed week!
-Pastor Jeff
Christ United Methodist Church of Cabot AR
10 Elk Horn Lane Cabot AR 72023
501-843-2302
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